Glossary
What is demand avoidance?
Also called: PDA, pathological demand avoidance, persistent drive for autonomy, extreme demand avoidance, EDA, PDA autism
Definition
Demand avoidance is a strong, often anxiety-driven need to resist or avoid everyday demands and expectations, and PDA (pathological demand avoidance) is a widely used name for a profile of autism where this is the central feature.
What it means
Most children avoid things they don’t want to do. In the PDA profile, the avoidance reaches ordinary requests the child may even want, such as getting dressed for a trip they are excited about. The demand itself seems to set off anxiety, and the child works hard to keep a sense of control.
The term was first described by the psychologist Elizabeth Newson in the 1980s. It is widely used by families, charities and some clinicians, and some assessment reports describe a child as having “autism with a demand avoidant profile”. It is also debated: PDA is not a separate diagnosis in DSM-5 or ICD-11, and professionals disagree about how best to understand it. Some autistic adults prefer “persistent drive for autonomy”.
What it can look like for your child
Your child may make excuses, change the subject, negotiate, distract you with something funny or suddenly be “too tired”. If pushed, they may panic, refuse outright or have a meltdown. Indirect requests can go better than direct ones. Many of these children are sociable, imaginative and good at role play, which can make the difficulty easy to miss. School attendance is often a struggle.
How counselling can help
Traditional approaches built on rewards and consequences often make things worse for these children. In sessions we keep demands low, offer choices and let the child lead, which is usually how trust starts. Over time we help the child notice the anxiety underneath and find more ways to feel in control. We also support parents, because living with high demand avoidance is tiring for the whole family.